Embracing Every Curve: Boudoir IS for everyone
At The Vixen Society, we pride ourselves on being fine art enthusiasts and body image specialists who have photographed every body type, size, and shape. Most importantly, we believe in our souls that beauty is not confined to a specific standard. EVERY woman deserves to feel empowered and confident in her own skin. But for many women, the idea of stepping in front of a camera (especially in lingerie or nude) can be very intimidating. Which is why we have made it our mission to create a safe and supportive space to let go and let the self-love rush in. One of my recent clients brought me to tears with her testimonial of her boudoir experience with us and I would like to share that with you today.
When asked what inspired Mrs. M to book her shoot, she let me know that it was not a decision that she made lightly. “I had been considering a boudoir photoshoot, primarily for my husband, for a couple of years, but kept putting it off because I was telling myself I would book it when I lost a certain amount of weight, or got to a certain pant size. I had it in my head that only women of a certain size would/could look good in a boudoir photoshoot,” Mrs. M began. “My whole life I've been a "big girl." My whole life has revolved around my size/weight. I don't remember a time I wasn't "dieting" or trying to make my body smaller. I cannot recall having ever seen another "big girl" boudoir photoshoot and I never thought it would be for me. Then, about 2 years ago a different boudoir photographer came across my social media feed and I became intrigued at the idea of actually booking a shoot. I followed them for a while, and saw how comfortable they made people (of all sizes) feel.”
After following this out-of-state studio and “convincing herself” that it was finally the right time, Mrs. M started her search for local boudoir photographers here in DFW. “The Vixen Society was the first studio I found and I contacted them immediately. I knew that I had to ride out this "high" so I didn't lose it and wait another 2+ years,” Mrs. M explained.
““My first call with Emma Jaye could not have gone any better, despite sobbing through most of the call. Emma Jaye was incredible. She was reassuring, she was understanding, she was sympathetic. She heard me, she heard my fears and she eased every single one of them. There was just an immediate connection, even over the phone. I got off the phone telling her that I would have to contact other studios to compare and make sure this one was right for me since this was literally the only studio I’d reached out to, but I didn’t call a single other studio. The next day I booked my shoot.””
I remember getting off of that initial phone call with Mrs. M and wanting to squeeze her tight and then strap her into lingerie and show her how absolutely stunning she is both inside and out. Her level of vulnerability with me on the phone was invigorating - I knew at that moment that she would be a client who would fully embrace our process. In return, our photo session would be magic from start to finish… and I promise you that it was! The morning of the session I could not wait to finally meet Mrs. M. I knew that she would be nervous, but I was also VERY confident that those nerves were going to melt away as the day began.
“I was so incredibly nervous going into the studio. This wasn't just a photoshoot. This was a photoshoot with all of my insecurities out in the open. But from the time I walked through the doors, everything felt right. There were no expectations. Just a "let's have fun" moment,” Mrs. M recalls. “Mimosa in hand, we headed to the closet. Walking into the massive lingerie closet was incredible. I don't have much of my own lingerie at home, so finding a studio that had a lingerie closet, including plus sizes, was a MUST for me. The Vixen Society blew that out of the water. Even as a plus size girl, I had more options than I knew what to do with. Having Emma Jaye there to help, with her trained eye, was what I needed. There were several outfits I wasn't sure how I felt about them and her encouragement to "just try them on, we can hate them later" brought me out of my comfort zone while simultaneously bringing me into my comfort zone for the shoot with Emma Jaye to come later.”
Hair, Makeup, and styling is another one of our specialties here at the studio - and for good reason. Society often bombards us with narrow ideals of what beauty should look like— and as women we have shared these struggles in fitting rooms and cosmetic stores across the globe. We can relate to all of these concerns, which is why we make sure our clients don’t have to stress about any of them. More importantly, from hair and makeup to styling, each session is catered to the incredible woman who is the queen of the studio that day! “For make-up, you can normally find me completely bare faced. I'll throw on mascara for a date night, but that's about it. I was so thankful that we could do a look that wasn't overwhelming and somewhat on the natural side (but still glam-y for a photoshoot!) that left me still feeling like myself,” Mrs. M reassures.
““Emma Jaye is incredible, not only as a photographer, but as a director, as a stager, as an outfit chooser, and as a confidant. It was as-if I had booked a shoot with a friend I’d known for years. She was my own personal hype girl, reminding me how fierce and badass, how sexy and sultry I was. And she believes it! She was constantly showing me how to get into the pose, not just talking me into it. And for someone who can be awkward in front of a camera, having someone getting into the position first was incredibly helpful.””
Mrs. M and I spent the entire photoshoot smiling, laughing, and borderline happy crying when I showed her a sneak peek on the back of the camera. We flowed so seamlessly from the outfits to the nudes, that I never would have been able to guess she had been skeptical about doing them. “When body image concerns/struggles came up in my original consultation with Emma Jaye, I could have started basically at my shoulders and gone all the way to my toes. I had something to critique about just about every body part. My arms, my shoulders, my breasts, my belly, my lower belly, my thighs, my calves, everything was "too big" and "too soft" or "not feminine" enough. My biggest insecurity - my lower belly - was going to be on full display. As women, we are force fed this "ideal body type" from the time we can walk. I've always been the biggest friend in my friend group, the biggest woman at the office, and have always been bigger than my partners. I cannot even begin to describe the amount of brain-space diet-culture has taken up, or how much money I've spent on various ways to make my body smaller, “ Mrs. M explains. “I remember Emma Jaye telling me in our consultation that we would do shoots in two outfits, move to implied nudes, and work our way to full nudes. I don't know if I said it outloud to her, but I definitely thought it. "You will not get me fully nude. I barely change clothes in front of my husband." By the time we got to the implied nudes, Emma Jaye had, how do you say this lightly, basically seen everything so I figured "if not now...when will you do this again?" and trusted her. Boy am I glad I ran with it.”
Boy am I glad she did too!! The memory of her seeing her final images at the ordering appointment will stay with me forever.
““Incredible doesn’t even begin to describe it. I never thought someone like me, a “big girl,” deserved to have a boudoir photoshoot, much less look good, dare I say stunning, in lingerie and even nude. I fully expected to be struggling to pick enough photos for my photobook, which after seeing the photos, I could have ordered every single one. The photos started out for me, for “woman empowerment,” and so I could maybe, just maybe, see myself the way my husband does. The timing worked out that I was going to get my photos returned right around our 2 year wedding anniversary and thought it would be a perfect gift for my husband as well. It ended up being a better gift for myself. We keep the photobook on a shelf in our closet and I pull it out often to look through it and recall the experience and remember just how fierce and sexy I really am. I now have extra grace for myself. I’m reminded frequently that Greek Goddesses had rolls and folds, imperfections and lumps, and were still idolized.””
When asked what she would tell a woman thinking about booking a photo shoot with us Mrs. responded enthusiastically, “Book it. Book it yesterday. There is not a single negative thing that could come from this and about a million positive ones. The only regret I have is that I waited so long to do it.”
I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t getting misty-eyed again just typing out this boudoir blog post! My goal as a boudoir photographer is to always highlight the beauty that you might not always see in yourself and show you how truly incredible you are…just as you are. I have had the honor of seeing the transformations that happen when women of all ages, backgrounds, and sizes embrace their bodies during a boudoir session. It’s not just about the photos for me—even though you WILL leave with STUNNING images that capture your essence. It’s truly about the confidence and self-love that comes from stepping out of your comfort zone and realizing that you are beautiful, powerful, and worthy RIGHT NOW.
- Emma Jaye
