Changing The Narrative: A Boudoir Shoot Through Terminal Cancer
We were not just capturing her journey through cancer, but capturing her joy, beauty, and love in our photography studio.
There are moments in our journey when we are faced with unimaginable challenges that undoubtedly test the depths of our strength. Moments where time seems to stand still while overflowing emotions engulf our hearts and souls. Receiving a medical diagnosis of any kind is an experience that no one will ever truly be prepared for, no matter how resilient of a person they are. For my client Ms. K, the diagnosis of terminal cancer was devastating news that shook the very foundation of her and her family’s world. Yet amidst the darkness of a diagnosis that would break most people, she found a way to rediscover her power and illuminate her journey through an act of self-love; a boudoir shoot with me at The Vixen Society.
To the average person who has never experienced this type of photo session, it may seem like an unusual choice for someone navigating an illness. But for Ms. K it was very clear that this was a conscious choice to redefine her narrative and celebrate the enduring love that she shares with her husband. It was a way to reclaim her body and identity, which had been profoundly affected by the treatments intended to heal her. A year before booking with us there were a series of treatments that led her to believe that she may never leave the hospital. But on a bright morning in Dallas, she courageously walked through the door of our studio and the ground shifted. Because her radiating aura would not only change her narrative, but it would also change mine.
We started the morning in hair and makeup with LaDonna Stein, who carefully listened to every request and concern with ease. Last year Ms. K had experienced complete hair loss but was now rocking her chic short hair look. Before the session, we had spoken about her bringing a few of her long hair wigs, but once we connected in person I discovered that her long hair has always been a big part of who she is. Both myself and LaDonna wanted to make sure that Ms. K’s images spoke to her highest self and celebrated HER rather than reminding her of what she was going through. So, Ladonna styled her short hair and then moved on to styling her wigs, so that when we were ready for them I could easily help her switch up her look.
While in hair and makeup, Ms. K and I were able to connect on a soul level. I compassionately listened to her life story from how she met her incredible husband to how she has met this new stage in her life and everything in between. I learned that she is a loving wife, a nurturing mother, a grandmother, and a dear friend, and was now asked to be a fighter. But I also learned that she has refused to let this discomfort define her. She lives every moment to the absolute fullest and her sense of self remains unshaken, even on the days that it might waver. In that hour of getting to know her, I was left in awe of her kind heart untouched by turmoil and the unconditional love for her family. Once we moved to styling for the session it was like we were two girlfriends on a shopping trip. My squeals of encouragement and our giggles filled the client closet in the most wholesome way. She looked stunning in the wardrobe that we chose and the smile on her face during that last look in the mirror will be ingrained in my heart forever.
We moved through the shoot effortlessly and with a happiness that clearly translates in the final images. Our first look was a modern Honey Birdette lingerie piece paired with sparkling heels and a total old Hollywood hairstyle. The second had more of a classic glam feel, equipped with stockings, Christian Louboutin heels, and her long curly hair. She truly looked just as glamorous as she felt. The last look was saved for timeless fine art nudes, but that wasn’t the last look of the day.
When Ms. K initially inquired with us, she had a dream of finishing the shoot with her husband doing a couples boudoir. Although this was something that we no longer offered, due to our desire to focus solely on empowering women, we made the exception in the name of true love. This was a couple who had been placed on a difficult path but had proven that they could get through anything as long as they were together. They used this chapter in their marriage as an opportunity to strengthen their relationship and support each other in ways that are more profound than most couples could ever imagine. How could we deny this request? Mr. M met us at the studio that afternoon, unknowing of what he was getting himself into, but eager to make his wife happy. I helped style him in relaxed jeans and a white button-down shirt that paired well with Ms. K’s all-black Honey Birdette skirt set. We started the session with poses and captures that could easily be placed in a home without guests coming over and raising an eyebrow. Although, the finished product may just incite them to believe that love is real. Halfway through the first set, I asked them to look into each other’s eyes and unexpectedly they both began to cry. The moment was so touching, I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t shooting through tears for the remainder of the first outfit. The second half of the shoot was much more intimate and vulnerable, but instead of letting that intimidate them they truly let go and trusted me with photographing a lasting testament to their love.
Boudoir is intimate. It requires you to undress in more ways than you are thinking. It encourages you to strip down emotions and be vulnerable to the intricate process in order to create art that makes you feel as soon as you see it.
As a boudoir photographer, I am constantly trying to navigate this complexity of emotions while finding a delicate balance of being both empathetic and professional. But when the shoot was finally over on this particular day, Ms. K and I embraced and we both cried together. Words can not simply describe what an honor it was to be trusted with creating these images. She genuinely thanked me through her tears for giving her and her husband this gift. But what she didn’t realize until the ordering appointment, was that she was also giving me a gift that will last a lifetime.
During the editing of the final image selections, I consistently found myself overwhelmed with emotion, specifically on the images of Ms. K and her husband. Their love was inspiring and so was she. I don’t know that I had ever been so excited and nervous for an ordering appointment before, but when the happy couple arrived it was easy to feel that a core memory was about to be made. The three of us watched the slideshow together that moved through the entire photoshoot in a way that told a beautiful story of Ms. K. There wasn’t a dry eye in the room. Although I was in love with the final images, I never asked for a model release that day. To me, the images were too precious and personal to publish. It wasn’t until I asked our private Vixen group for women willing to share their unique stories that Ms. K reached out and permitted me to share hers. Her story is one that deserves to be shared because it is a testament to the human spirit. It is a story of courage, dignity, hope, grace, and a quiet determination that speaks volumes. Ms. K embodies the essence of a life well lived and reminds us of the beauty that lies within us both physically and spiritually. Her story lights the way for all of us; inspiring each and every woman she touches to face life’s trials with their head held high and their heels even higher.
With All My Heart
Emma Jaye
