“Thank You For Helping Me See What I Couldn’t”: A Boudoir Journey
Seeing Herself Again: Chapter of Transformation
As human beings, we live in bodies that are constantly changing. You hear about it through advertisements and entertainment in society. You experience it as you age and as you enter different chapters of your life. But people seldom talk about the huge mental shift that comes with those physical changes. As a female boudoir photographer, I have both experienced this struggle and witnessed it firsthand. I have multiple consultation calls a week from future clients inquiring about booking a boudoir session to document different seasons in their lives. These vary from milestone birthdays to weddings, weight loss to cancer journeys, and everything in between. Regardless of my client’s “why”, my goal is to teach them that amid the hardship of these fluctuations that we all face, there’s also a quiet truth: your body is not betraying you. It’s evolving. YOU are evolving. Some days may be harder than others, but slowly, you learn that the love and kindness you show yourself is the only path to peace. You’re more than the skin you live in - infinitely more - and though these changes can be hard at times, they can also be the door to deeper self-compassion.
A recent client of mine embraced these changes with grace and courage that all began on a solo trip. “I recently lost over 130 pounds. Before that, I never allowed myself to be photographed and would constantly crop out parts of myself to hide,” Mrs. S explains. “About a month ago, while taking beach photos in Mexico, I actually thought I looked good!” On our consultation call, she described her experience vividly to ensure that I understood the journey that brought her to this chapter of self-love. On the day of her flying dress photoshoot in Mexico, standing on the cliffs overlooking the ocean, the breeze tugging at the flowing fabric of her billowing gown, Ms. S felt a spark of change. It ignited a new desire—to celebrate her beauty in a way that felt deeply personal and intimate. The walls she had built between herself and her body were beginning to crumble, and the possibility of truly seeing herself seemed within reach.
That’s when she discovered boudoir photography. Back home, Ms.S had a conversation with her hairdresser about a local boudoir studio…The Vixen Society. Another stylist at her salon had worked with us and sent quite a few new Vixens our way! (We are forever grateful for her!) “Intrigued, I visited their website, browsed through the gallery, and was amazed by the artistry. Seeing a variety of beautiful women, I thought, ‘I can do this too!’” Ms. S reminisces. “In that moment, I filled out the questionnaire and received a consultation call the very next day. Two weeks later, I was in the studio for my photo session.” That is when the magic began!
“I struggled with body image after gaining weight, reaching my heaviest at 295 pounds. I never thought I was ugly, but I wasn’t happy with my body. Now that I've lost weight, I have stretch marks, loose skin, and other changes. I talked to Emma about these concerns, and she reassured me that everything would be okay. During and after my photo session, those issues didn't matter anymore. I don't care about other people's opinions or views of me. I am beautiful, and I know it!”
The morning of the shoot with Ms. S felt like reuniting with an old friend. During hair and makeup we talked about everything from travel to wellness, and had a vulnerable conversation about embracing the many different styles, vibes, and personalities a woman can have. Once I learned what resonated with her and how she wanted to “feel” when she looked back at her images, we were able to style her shoot in the luxury lingerie closet. We decided together that the first look would be soft and speak to her feminine side. A classic white-lace bodysuit was the perfect wardrobe choice to exude romance and self-love. Our jewel-toned vintage set rounded out the first outfit with a welcoming energy. I helped pose Ms. S head to toe the entire time and coached a variety of different facial expressions that would really show off her unique personality. Between my excited squeals of encouragement, we found ourselves laughing and enjoying every second!
“The photoshoot was truly incredible!” Ms S gushes. “The environment was so body-positive, and I had an absolute blast. Emma and Tamara are simply the best. The atmosphere was so uplifting that any insecurities about my body completely vanished.”
For our second look, we wanted to completely switch the vibe to an edgier essence. The Honey Birdette Vienna collection certainly matched the mood with a firm push-up bra layered with a sheer bralette and strappy open-back waspie skirt. This look is best paired with Louboutin pumps and a bright red paddle to match the red-bottoms. Ms. S stepped into that confidence with pride. I could’ve cried when I saw her strike that first power pose, because it was clear that she felt it down to her core. We moved from this badass corner of the dark and moody bedroom set into sultry implied-nudes and then empowering full nudes in our chandelier room. Ms. S trusted me the entire photoshoot and I could NOT wait to show her the final results at her ordering appointment. I couldn't help but show her a little sneak peek of one of the nudes on the back of my camera before she left. We both got teary eyed when she saw it and I watched her initial disbelief turn into something much more beautiful. She saw herself not through the lens of what she needed to change, but in awe of the woman she had become.
The ordering appointment was an emotionally charged celebration of her journey and I felt honored to be a part of it. I had put all 55 of her finished images into a slideshow video with music. The first thing we did that day was watch it together and proudly discover the magic we had made together.
“I couldn't believe it was me!I was utterly amazed by Emma's artistry—and by her subject! I truly couldn’t believe it was me. I am beautiful. I thanked Emma for capturing what I hadn't been able to see in myself. I cried.”
It was as if she was finally seeing herself for the first time. It felt far more like an awakening than just a photoshoot. I’ll never forget when she looked at me and said “thank you for helping me see what I couldn’t.” We hugged tightly and then eagerly went through her images to select what would work best in her photo album. “The photoshoot was initially meant as a gift for my husband for our upcoming anniversary,” Ms S laughs. “...but it turned out to be an empowering experience for me as well. So, in a way, it was a gift for both of us!” Little did she know, it was also a gift for me. To be able to show women how incredibly stunning they are…EXACTLY as they are is a privilege that I don’t take lightly. Interviewing Ms. S after our session I learned that things have shifted for her. She stands taller, moves with intention, and embraces the woman she has become. Where there was once self-doubt, there is now power. When she looks in the mirror, she no longer sees someone who needs to hide, but someone who deserves to be seen—fully, without compromise. Her mantra, “Live and let live,” has become more than a saying; it’s a declaration of the freedom she’s found. For anyone considering booking a boudoir session with The Vixen Society, her message is simple: “Do it.” Do it because you are beautiful, exactly as you are. Let go of the fear. Step into the light. The moment you do, you’ll finally see what the world has always known—you’ve been beautiful all along.
